The best relationships have ups and downs and even when externally it may look like they never have any issues, they actually do. It is their ability to manage their differences and whatever issues that come up that determines how successful the relationship will turn out.
Sometimes, we could get so carried away by a couple of occurrences in a relationship that we lose focus of the bigger picture. When sight of this big picture is lost, you can find couples separating only to regret the separation when they are apart. They suddenly realize that the reason for the breakup was not worth it after all.
According to psychologists, the most common kind of regret experienced by people is that of a failed relationship. You can read about it here.
While some of these relationships may have gone past the point of no return, a lot of others still have chances of being repaired. This article is focused on helping folks in this latter category get their exes back. Let’s get right into it.
Before You Get Started
Before attempting to get back with your ex, it is important to ask yourself one very important question – WHY? Why do you want to get back together?
If you cannot answer this question sincerely, then you may not be truly ready for this process. Answering this question sincerely will help you properly evaluate things and determine if indeed you two should really get back together.
According to psychologists and relationship experts, there are a number of different reasons why separated couples may want to come back together. Sadly, not all the reasons given are ideal reasons for which this step should be taken.
For some, they simply get so lonely that they forget the reason why they separated in the first place. Their loneliness blinds them, making the truth of their past dim and seemingly not as important as it really is.
For some others, they are simply afraid of venturing out to meet new people. They totally agree with the saying “the devil you know is better than the angel you do not know”. Here are a few more reasons for marriage failures.
When people get back together for the wrong reasons, it does not take long before the same things that drove them apart in the first place come back into play, driving the same wedge between them. If herefore you want to embark on this journey of reconciliation, you must first ascertain that you are doing it for the right reasons.
Once you are sure your reasons are right and genuine, you can then proceed with the tips we are about to share.
Tips to Help You get Your Ex Back
Rein In Your Emotions
This is not a time to be ruled by emotions. Letting your emotions get then better of you will not help you in any way. The first thing to do is to ensure your emotions are brought under full control. Yes, this is easier said than done but it is crucial if you will succeed in the different steps you need to take. Remember, this should be a journey based on strategy and not on emotions.
Critically Evaluate the Past
Before making any kind of move, you must take some time to really evaluate your relationship with a view to understanding what led to the breakup in the first place. Was it something you did or something you did not do? Once you can lay your fingers on the possible reasons for the relationship coming to an end, then you can try to find a way to remedy the situation.
Give Some Space
One thing you do not want to do is crowd your ex. Yes you have decided in your mind that you need him or her back. You should however not immediately run back to him or her. Give them some space. The truth is that if they feel you have easily gotten over them, they won’t be too happy about that. Sounds kind of mean but that’s the truth. If you happen to run into them, don’t go all mushy. Be nice, polite and stable.
Take Care of Yourself
Do not let your looks go to pieces. You want your ex to see you and see what they are missing and not what they escaped from. Never let yourself go; keep it together and invest more time in looking good. This is sure to raise some interest.
Evaluate Other Options
Though you have decided that you want him or her back, go out there and get into the mix. Socialize and get back in the game. This more than anything will boost your confidence in yourself. No one wants someone that no other person wants. If you are seen as desirable by others, your confidence will soar and your ex will notice this.
Try Having a Casual Contact
Having understood what caused the separation in the first place and having given some space while also taking care of yourself and putting yourself out there, you can now initiate a casual meeting with your primary target. It should not be something serious. A casual drink will do. Have a general conversation and make sure you take time to feel them out. You should be able to determine from your conversation if there is a possibility that s/he will want you back.
Lay Your Cards on the Table
Following your casual meeting(s), if you see signs that this may work, you can then lay your cards on the table. It should not be forceful, emotional, teary or groveling. It should be clear and concise. Address the issue that led to the breakup, apologize where you need to and offer solutions that will ensure they do not occur again.
After following the tips shared here and those you will find on sites like
https://www.datingthrone.com/how-to-get-your-ex-girlfriend-back/, you should be able to get back together if that is what they also want.
You should bear in mind that your ex may not want to get back with you. All of these tips will only work if they want to be in a relationship with you again. If they do not, there is nothing you can do about it.
Yours is to do the best you can and leave the rest. The steps outlined here will ensure you have the best chance of getting them back. If you do succeed, make sure to invest more time into making it work this time.